I’m very humbled by my experiences here. The patients whom I serve emanate humility. Julia said it well with, “they are simple and live a simple life.” They’re very practical and it’s refreshing to work with them. Vanity is not something that exists for these patients. “O, I am struggling to hear, or my ear really hurts, or I’m curious about my hearing, let me go sit and wait outside – give up a full day of work, to wait for hours, until I am seen by the audiologist.” If there’s a problem they go to fix it. Fortunately we’re here and able to do that (in most cases). But it is difficult to accept that I can only do ears when I feel like the medical doctors shouldn’t be practicing medicine!
This experience has taught me a lot but most importantly it has shown me that I love what I do – and I hate that I can’t do more. But at least I’m doing something. I’ve done community service & humanitarian efforts before but nothing like this. I love the field of audiology and as rewarded as I feel doing it in the U.S. it doesn’t even come close to how rewarding it is here.
I’ve always had the goal to change the world & I’ve always been determined to do. Now I know that this is what I was born to do. To travel and use all of my skills (leading, organizing, implementing, running, & being in charge of events, audiology, counseling, education, etc. etc.) to fill a fast void that I am better equipped to handle (thank you Mama Shih & Oticon) and more aware of. I still have the goal of opening my own clinic in both the U.S. and abroad, and doing humanitarian work through that. However, now I have a better idea of how and why. There are so many things I would love to implement here – if only I was here for more than a week. I CANNOT believe my week is nearly finished & I have zero desire to go home. I would love to stay here – it’s perfect for me. Though I wouldn’t want to live in the clinic. As nice as it is to have no commute I’m not getting any extra sleep. Side note: as tired as I am, I’m really not. For 18-19 hours a day I’m thinking or helping or doing paper work — and yet none of it feels like work. It is a joy that brings peace, calmness, and excitement. It’s nice to have that while helping and being busy (as opposed to obtaining that with me time, family time, or friend time).
I feel selfish in a way because I want to stay and I want to help and to give. I am selfish in that this is for me as much as it is for them.